Ep 85 Honouring Hunger In Real Life Situations

Hello hello hello and welcome to Episode No 85! Wowzers... not long until 100.... say whaaaaat!

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On today's episode, I am diving into what can sometimes seem like a tricky paradox honouring your hunger and working on 'weight loss' when navigating real life situations like lunch breaks, family meals, meals out etc.

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As you know I encourage intuitive style eating, changing your relationship with food and if you are working on 'weight loss' doing so with love which means ditching the counting of calories, points or fads and listening to your mind, body and soul.

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You may be thinking can you really achieve your well-being goals without counting calories or obsessively tracking every point or macro? Can you really trust and listen to your body change your relationship with food, and if you wish to 'lose weight'?

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The answer is yes!

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Why?

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Because our relationship with food and 'weight loss' with love is about something deeper than superficial measurements on a scale or arbitrary calorie guidelines.

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By focusing on listening to your body's signals, understanding your unique emotional connections to food, and redefining how food and joyful movement fits into your life you can embark on a sustainable path towards 'weight loss' that doesn't compromise your mental well-being.

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Just take a moment and imagine no longer feeling guilt-ridden after enjoying something you perhaps would have previously called an 'indulgent treat' or experiencing anxiety around social gatherings centred around food.

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What if your 'weight loss' journey felt light and loving and kind and that you gave yourself full permission to free yourself from societal pressures while still achieving your desired results?

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How would that feel?

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In today's show, I want to talk about navigating life and honouring your hunger. So get ready to ditch that diet drama and dive on in with me

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Honouring Hunger And More Importantly Checking In On The Why

First up let's recap on what honouring hunger actually is.

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Honouring hunger is about acknowledging and listening to your body's signals for genuine physical need but also doing so in a way that does not leave you falling into the vicious diet cycle of deprivation followed by overindulgence which can happen on typical diets.

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It's important to remember that everyone's body is different and that your hunger level can vary from day to day which is why points, calorie and elimination based diets can sometimes feel bloody hard.

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The key to 'intuitive eating' and changing your relationship with food is tuning into your body's cues and honouring them without judgment or restriction. When working on 'weight loss' with love you are still working on honouring those cues without judgment but you will look to pay closer attention to them and experiment more with love for 'weight loss'.

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It is also about looking more closely at why you eat and super sleuthing the hell out of it.

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It does not mean, staving yourself, waiting to eat so long that you feel poorly. What we work on is waiting until you genuinely are in need of food rather than some other reason for example, because the clock says it's time for a meal or snack, for emotional reasons, because the doughnuts spelt nice? Understanding the reasons behind your eating habits can provide valuable insight into our overall relationship with food and help you make more mindful, purposeful choices.

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Sometimes you will still turn to food as a source of comfort, seeking solace in ice cream after a long day or using food, such as, chocolate as a form of stress relief. But by acknowledging the emotional motivations behind your eating, you can start to disentangle your emotions from your meals and all it takes is a little self-reflection but the long term benefits and impact to your 'weight loss' with love journey can be profound.

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So are you turning to food when you are bored rather than in physical need?

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Do you find yourself mindlessly snacking while scrolling through social media?

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Are you eating because you got triggered walking past the pastry shop?

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Identifying these patterns allows you to address your emotional triggers and develop healthier coping mechanisms instead of solely relying on food thus in turn allowing you to honour your hunger more.

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Next time you sit down for a meal or reach for a snack, ask yourself WHY are you eating?

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Are you truly hungry, or are there other factors influencing your decision?

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But how do you honour your hunger, if your hunger doesn't arrive at a time that is convenient to your life?

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What if you are hungry outside of your lunch break at work? Late in the evening or middle of the night? What if you want to go out with friends or sit down for a family meal and the time they are eating does not fit your hunger?

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What then?

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Well, that is what I want to help you dive into today.

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When Hunger & Life Don't Meet

So what do you do when your body is telling you it is hungry but you are nowhere near your next meal or what do you do if it is your lunch break at work or it is family meal time but you are not physically in need of food? What do you do when hunger and life don't meet eye to eye?

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In these situations, I would offer to you that you remember what you are working on. A life of food and life freedom, a life where you get to decide how you want to show up daily for your life, your body, your weight loss, your way. We are ditching diet rules and drama so breathe you have got this and can figure it out.

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You won't die if you get a little hungry and likewise, you won't die if you overeat one meal.

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The key thing to remember is YOU get to decide and you can do this with the Triple-A-Way™️ framework Awareness, Action and Accountability.

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Applying The Triple-A-Way™️

So let's work through the steps together:

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First step are you clear on your goals? What do you want your relationship with food to be? What are your priorities? How do you want to show up? If you are not sure about this then you may find yourself flip-flopping the key is to DECIDE. There are loads of tools and support to help you if you are a Wellness 4 Women Member so if you are not sure where to start shout up in the support group or hop onto a coaching call if you are a VIP. Of course, if you are not a member you can join today and start changing your relationship with food.

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From there it depends on when you are making your decision and doing your super sleuthing.

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As ever you have 3 opportunities to make a decision, before, during or after and you can supersleuth the fluff out of it and find a way or several ways that work for you and your goals.

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You can also use my 5 D's of action framework: Decide, Do, Discover, Deal, Do Again.

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Before making a decision, it's important to gather as much information as possible. This is where your super sleuthing skills come into play. Do you have any past experiences that you can rely on, any knowledge about how you and your body tick that you can use to build a your realistic plan?

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Do you know your triggers? e.g. are you a clock eater? a plate clearer? Or maybe you tend to overindulge when certain emotions arise. Understanding your patterns and triggers can help you develop strategies to avoid or manage them. It's also helpful to consider any external factors that may influence your decision, such as social settings or the availability of 'healthy' food options.

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Once you have taken some time and gone through a series of realistic plans and loving daily assessments you will start to gather the necessary information to apply to really start to fine tune your realistic plans because the realistic plan is not just about planning a menu of food for the day.

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Take a look at what you have discovered.

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Now comes the fun part - getting creative looking for alternatives! Challenge yourself, to think outside the box and explore different possibilities. Notice if you have old food rules and norms. Are you just playing out old habit loops? There are often more ways than we think but we can be quite closed down because of these rules and loops.

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Things like eating only in lunch breaks and family meals these are likely being dictated by underlying beliefs but the great thing is you can change your beliefs if you want to or you get to keep them and make them work the choice is yours.

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So you have your list of options what next?

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Consider the potential options and outcomes of each decision and how they align with your goals. Which choice will likely bring you closer to your desired outcome, which if any has pitfalls or may hinder progress? Is there a difference in the short term or long term?

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Now you get to decide, what are you going to try?

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Let's work through a scenario but before I do let's check in on the type of plans you are building.

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Realistic Planning For Your Success

I encourage my members to make a super duper realistic food plan for the day. So check in and establish whether it really is truly realistic. Does your plan set you up for listening to your body and mind?

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Gone are the days of restrictive rules and rigid meal plans; instead, I'm inviting you on a journey where you can foster a harmonious relationship with food that not only nourishes your body but that also honours your individual needs and that can require flexibility and adaptability.

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One thing I used to hate was making a food plan when on a diet. Sitting down trying to figure out how I was going to spend my points or calories depending on what diet I was trying to work at the time. There were usually never enough points for what I wanted to eat and it always felt like I was robbing Peter to pay Paul. There were dilemmas around trying to be 'good', should I save points for the weekend, wanting all the things but not feeling like I was allowed to eat them. Sure the diets said I could have what I wanted but then I couldn't because the points wouldn't allow for it within busting the limits.

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It all just felt so complex and limiting and full of DRAMA!

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I hated it so much I wouldn't make a plan, flying by the seat of my pants only to find I had eaten my allowance by lunch time looking down the barrel of yet another jacket potato or salad for dinner which I considered to be 'safe' diet food.

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There was also many a day I would plan the meals only to then find myself, too tired to cook and grabbing takeout, the food I needed somehow was not in the fridge or I was out and about and completely adrift as I didn't know how any points or calories was in the damn food item in front of me.

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The other thing that I used to do when planning the 'old way' was to plan out Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner and Snacks the 4 horsemen of the meal plan but really this was just re-enforcing a systemic societal norm that we 'should' eat 3 square meals a day. If you buy any planner it likely has a space for BLD or BLDS but this could be encouraging you to overeat unless eating 3 square meals is what you truly want to do not what you think it is what you SHOULD do.

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Personally, I say rip up the rulebook. Challenge the norms and build your own system. For true food freedom, it is about building your day around the food you want and choosing to eat it in line with your body with love.

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Intuitive style eating is not about adhering to strict rules but rather learning how to honour your body's unique cues while maintaining overall health goals and 'weight loss' with love is about playing about with quantity and quality with mindful curiosity.

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When you embrace the realistic plan as is outlined in Triple-A-Way™️ for example it is an opportunity to create ease in your day, creativity and self-discovery.

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Instead of rigidly adhering to set meal times, calories/points or portion sizes dictated by outside sources, you can create a framework that allows you the freedom to make choices based on your individual appetite and how your day is shaping up.

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This shift in mindset and process will not only enhance your relationship with food but can also empower you to make choices based on what truly nourishes and satisfies YOU.

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The key here is as I said realistic.

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What do you want to eat?

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Do you have time to cook it/eat it?

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What is likely to come up in your day to derail you?

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Do you need to build in pivot points?

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How can you make your day easy?

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These are just a few things you could consider.

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A few micro decisions at the start of your day about how you are going to show up is all it takes to build a realistic plan and this can apply to hunger too.

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Examples

So let's move on to an example.

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Fixed Lunches

So picture this. You work in an Office. You were hungry so had a delicious breakfast. Your designated lunch break is 12 but you are not hungry. Crap what do you do? You bought a microwave meal and you are only allowed to eat it between 12:00 and 13:00 as the policy is no hot food at your desk.

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What are the choices? What are your thoughts?

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1) Eat it, it's my lunch break and the clock says I eat so I must eat else I will get hungry but chances are you are then having an overeat.

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2) Save it for later, and hope you don't get hungry. But then you remember you have that emergency apple, banana and a protein bar for if I am hungry.

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3) Eat a bit and save/throw the rest.

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4) Go out and find something you are allowed to eat at your desk instead later.

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The answer is there is no right or wrong answer here. You get to DECIDE. You will then DO it. Then you get to DISCOVER. Then you DEAL whether that be with the physical or emotional and get to learn from the experience and come up with a new plan for these eventualities and then you get to DO IT AGAIN. Changing our relationship with food and weight loss with love is just a series of decisions.

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The key part here really is the DISCOVER. Can you learn from this? Was the plan perhaps not realistic? Can you build in flexibility and pivot points that still honour your body and goals? Do you decide to keep eating by the clock but then look to adjust later in the day with love and no restriction of course. There are a number of ways you could work around this without drama.

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Let's do another

​Not Hungry For Lunch

You are a stay at home mamma and your kiddos are at school or maybe you are a homeworker. You have more flexibility than the office worker. You realise you are not hungry for lunch but if you wait you will want lunch around 3 but then you think but I can't eat at 3 as then I won't be hungry for tea and you have planned a special meal. Or I will be hungry too late in the evening.

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What are the choices? What are your thoughts?

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1) Eat it, you can't risk being hungry at the 'wrong' time later.

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2) Eat a bit and save/throw the rest

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3) Wait for hunger but then eat a smaller item at 3 to conduct a loving experiment as to whether I am hungry for dinner

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4) Eat at 3 and worry about the rest later.

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Just like before there really is no right or wrong answer and the gold is in the discovery. Maybe it shows you the plan was not realistic. Maybe you need to build in pivot points. Maybe you decide to do more experimentation round clock eating. For me, it is all about balance and again looking out for food rules and habits. The meal in the evening who said you had to have the full plate? Who said you had to eat what the family ate? If you choose to then figure out a way to try and make it work for you without or with a minimal impact on your goals. At the end of the day one or two meals and or overeats are not likely to make vast differences.

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What is absolutely critical is that you deal with this with love and compassion for yourself. We want a healthy relationship with food. No beat downs, no judgement, just matter of fact loving curiosity and then a little bit of super sleuthing to see what we can improve on mind, body and soul.

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Keep it easy. Keep it fun. Enjoy the journey.

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Round Up

Right, that's it, folks. In summary, life is going to happen. 'Weight loss' with any method is not a fine science as there are just too many unique daily variables. Try your best. Take ownership and do your best. Grow and learn.

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But whatever you do for a healthy relationship with food treat yourself with love and compassion.

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Not yet a member and want to work on changing your relationship with food, one bite and one belief at a time with LOVE then check it out below 👇 

Prefer to work 1 to 1 or explore other options go to my work with me page.